Harnessing Self Love: Be Your Own Valentine

Harnessing Self Love: Be Your Own Valentine

Maria ThomasFeb 14, '23

Over the years, valentine’s day has evolved to define itself uniquely to each of us, with the common thread being that it is celebrated as a day of love - love in all forms, shapes, types and colours. For the skeptic, valentine’s day may not mean much, for the romantics, valentine’s day gets hearts fluttering with ideas of extravagant love. 

For most of us, even though we celebrate the day, the historical context has somehow evaded us. Here, we briefly share the dark history behind Valentine’s Day and how it came about it as a day symbolic of love. 

The exact origin of the story is debatable even today. In one version, the day finds its origins much before St. Valentine, in the Roman festival of Lupercalia and its superstitions which centered around a woman’s fertility. Lupercalia was considered a feast for potential lovers and had traditions that celebrated the union of mates quite wildly and pompously. The festival was eventually outlawed because of some of its gruesome practices and was no longer celebrated by the end of the 5th century. Shortly after, Pope Gelasius renamed the feast to call it St. Valentine’s Day

As Christianity spread across the Roman empire, the day soon evolved into a day to commemorate St. Valentine. Even in the case of St. Valentine, there are two versions of the story that have been told and retold enough times through history without sufficient proof to pin-point a specific day that valentine’s day came about as both stories seem equally befitting and apt. Who is St. Valentine and how did valentine’s day come about? 

Valentines Day Collection


Version one: 

As of today, the original story of St. Valentine is still up for debate. During the third century, Roman Emperor Claudius II is said to have executed two men who held the same name of Valentine. However, the executions took place apart from each other, leaving historians confused as to who the real namesake of valentine’s day might be. In the first version of the story, Valentine belonged to the priesthood, which during that time (like in the case of many other Roman soldiers), meant that he could not marry. However, St. Valentine went ahead to defy the decree and married his lovers in secret. As soon as news reached the Emperor, Valentine was sentenced to death, and the day of his death came to be known as Valentine’s Day. 

Version two: 

In another version, there was a priest named Valentine who was put into prison for the sole reason that he had fallen in love with one of his prison visitors. They had begun writing letters to each other from inside the prison walls before Valentine was caught and reprimanded for his actions. To love someone was an act of rebellion during those times, and Valentine could not help himself. The story goes on to say that in one of his final letters to his lover before he was executed, he had signed off the letter with the words “from your valentine”. 

Both stories seem credible enough to attribute it to a day of love and a day for lovers to openly express their love for one another. The common thread that ties these stories together is that St. Valentine was a martyr for love, and that made for a great story that passed down through the ages. 

Valentine’s Day would naturally mean something different to each of us, whether we know the origins of the day or not. And while Valentine's Day is a day that is widely known to be for lovers, this 2023, we implore that you take a different approach and shine the light on yourself. In other words, the day is about you and for you. 

In a world that teaches us to find flaws within ourselves, to find reasons to feel inadequate or insufficient, self-love becomes a bold and rebellious choice. So while we go all out for our lovers on this day, how about we change it up a bit and go all out for ourselves? 

Here we discuss a few ways to shower love and presents on ourselves and sow a good seed that might reap its reward tomorrow. After all, how much can one love another if there’s no love emanating for themselves from within? The ability to love someone healthily comes from being able to love yourself first. 

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How can we reclaim Valentine’s Day for ourselves? 

1.Mind over matter 

Mind over matter is a proverb that highlights the importance of living beyond our materialistic tendencies, conditionings and expectations by nurturing our minds to derive meaning in deeper ways of living. This rings true for the single bees as well as for the ones in committed relationships because at either of these points there is our tendency to self-abandon. When we practice awareness as a way of life, it becomes easier for the mind to spot these tendencies that lead us to live lives smaller than ourselves; where we unconsciously end up giving more importance to the external over the internal. One of the best gifts you can give yourself this valentine’s day is to adopt mindfulness practices that will translate into our entire lives. Our minds have power to manifest its desires, and when we mindfully manifest, love feels more wholesome and complete. 

2. No love like self-love 

Today the word self-love means different things to different people, but they all come from the same space of loving oneself first and loving the world as a consequence of that. In simple words, we are loving ourselves in those little moments where we are conscious in the ways we choose ourselves and show kindness to ourselves. For some self-love translates into pampering themselves or treating themselves to something extravagant, for some it means seeking mental health support, for some it means living a conscious and aware life. When we learn to live authentically, our interactions with the world are more enriched and our relationships more satisfying. Whatever self-love means to you, step out of your comfort zone this valentine’s day and remind yourself that you matter more than anything else in this world. This day is an ode to you. 

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3.To give is to receive 

Valentine’s Day is a day where we expect gifts and also give out gifts to our lovers and loved ones. Whether you are in a committed relationship or not, there are more ways than one to give. A great way is to exchange creative gifts between lovers, or better yet, find a friend or a family member close to you and buy them a special something to remind them that they are loved. 

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By giving to others we end up giving back to ourselves. Another great way to give is to causes bigger than our own. This Valentine’s Day, giving out to charities and causes that are close to the heart might just be that one thing that adds more meaning to life, giving a larger view of the world outside of our own troubles. Invest time in finding out the causes close to your heart, and make the brave decision of lending a supporting hand either through your presence or by some other means accessible to you. 

4.Leave more footprints behind 

Traveling is one of the best ways we can show love to ourselves. When we travel, we open our minds to different possibilities outside the bubbles of our existence. Being exposed to different walks of life, different places, different cultures, languages, and relationships, our minds become more fluid to accept life for what it is. It is in these raw moments that we can still our minds to find beauty in the chaos. Not just that, places help us understand our history, and knowing our history allows us to live more authentic, perceptive lives and hold values that are strong as day. Traveling makes us better individuals and by virtue of that better lovers. So this valentine’s day, step out into something unknown, dip yourself in deeper waters, immerse yourself in broader spaces. 

There is no better time than now, so buy yourself that ticket you’ve been longing to get for a long time, and get your bags packing. 

5.Befriend your solitude 

In a world that is designed to have our attention at all times, it becomes harder to find and enjoy our own solitude. It is easy to get lost in the chaos of the world such that our own individual voices take a step back. Solitude is one of the best ways to return to the world in a state of peace and awareness rather than adding to the existing chaos in the world. When we tread gently with the world, we often find that the world also treads gently back with us. At any low or high state of mind, our silence can prove to be one of the safest spaces where all the answers to our questions remain. This valentine’s day, choose to spend more time with yourself and to pay attention to the nuances of silence. 

Valentines Day Collection

You can also visit Gubbacci design Studio to design your own custom T-shirt. And you can also browse some best selling collections like  Family Vacation Collection, Family Reunion Collection, Fathers Day Collection and Mothers Day Collection and many more. 

 

 

 

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